FFT

Most of the time, I do not want to look sick anymore. I hate how i looked when i was just like a skeleton at 31kg. But in fact, now I am way above and I know I look so much better and am in a better state of health. I've used to think that being "sick" was good, but it was just a tedious process that I go through everyday by forcing myself. Why live as though you've no choice? Just live. For Once. Whats up with being fat? People dont get fat easily, its all about the BID that I see. Upon myself, and it sucks so much trying to feel better when all I see is FAT. But I know that its healthy and that's what I need the most. There's always a set weight for everyone, thats what I came to realise as well, and so what if the weight goes down v low? Ultimately, everyone will hit rock bottom and their body will go back to the set weight it was meant to be. That'd mean being able to just eat and keep the food down just like any normal person and the weight will maintain. I guess that's life, some people just have to learn it the hard way but its always for a purpose. I know I've come so far, why do I want to throw my efforts away and be back to the skeletal me? And my resolution for 2013 will and shall be to not defer any sem and work towards graduation with c because that is a pact. I will not let ed affect what i have built over the years because i cant let the past affect me, instead i can choose how my future is going to be. We will stand tall and strong to walk through together. I believe that w will have a good future and because you deserve the best. Beauty isnt just how you look. Thin or fat doesn't define beauty. I love you w:* Everyone's beautiful in their own ways. xx