Bad day turned good

Today's meal didn't start off well. Restricted more than yesterday and yeah baby I know that if I don't break the cycle of restricting, I definitely will restrict much worse tomorrow. Breakfast started off not-so-good. Cos yeah, restricted. Then lunch, restricted again. And only had some biscuits in between. Gag. Thankfully Mom got me to go get somemore food cause I was losing weight on the scale and on the appearance. Even sister said so! I can't deny it any further, can I? Though it doesn't feel like I lost any. LOL. Actually before heading downstairs to grab those snacks, already planned out with mom what to get. But when I reached, I only got Mom's share! My heart was seriously thumping so loudly oh god and I was so anxious, maybe anxiety attack again ._. OMG thank God ttm that SuLynn answered her phone and I managed to get those stuffs though it was different from what was planned, but still about the same. Like got the substitutes for the ones I didn't want:) yay. Thanks sweetie:) And yeap, finished them all! Awesome. Ed was so dominant, and got worse again when i started restricting gag hate Ed. And Ed wanted Mom to cook Aglio Olio cause it was a safer choice, much much safer than outside food, probably no extra portions and definitely much lower in calories! Hey hey Ed was oh-so wrong! I went against it. So now, Mom isn't cooking this safe choice anymore! Dad will be buying back my food for me hehe love love it. Bet I will be enjoying dinner tonight even if my stomach is gonna burst ahhaha. At least I didn't let Ed get its way at the end of the day. Yay. Today's a really boring day. Finishing the IRIS show already. zomg so interesting! And was just doing cross-stitch. Quite time consuming though, a good way to kill time. But strain the eyes too. Supper oh supper, idk how will it go:( will i skip it again? Mhmmm. Really hope one day I will be able to eat whatever I want without thinking. Now trying to cut down the frequency of me typing out what I eat, hopefully it helps me to stop thinking and reflecting on what I eat in case it makes me regret. And tomorrow starting on my plan with Sulynn! Girl, better remember! :) Ok, that's for all. Oh and people, those anorexics, go challenge yourself to at least a unsafe food or meal daily ok! And sooner, I believe Ed will fuck off! That's all what we want, work hard:)

xoxo